Drawing Closer.

Let's see...it's been OVER a year since I've blogged. It all pretty much stopped on July 6, 2009....the day Pop was diagnosed with the "Big C". Not just the basic cancer....stage 4, TERMINAL. It's been a long road. Our family has been through the gambit of emotional, physical, physcological and even relational changes in the last 15 months.
Most of you have been kept abreast of Pop's situation....my mom is good at keeping everyone informed. There's not much else to say about it. The dr.'s say he's going to die....there's nothing they can do. We are STILL standing on the Lord, looking to him for peace, comfort, encouragement. It's a moment by moment process....one moment I'm hopeful and the next moment I am wavering with death staring me in the face. With that said, I, at times, keep my self distant to the cancer....I don't really read all of my mom's updates (mostly because I see it for myself every day), I've come accustomed to the routine of mom and pop not leaving the house, like it's just the way they live and not because he's too sick to get out of bed.
In a need to just survive, I've also withdrawn from a deepness with my Heavenly Father. I'm not too sure why....Fear? Possibly..... Anger? Possibly that, too..... Keeping everything on the surface, refusing to see the reality of what's happening before me. Though I've stepped away, He (God) has continued to speak to me, gently calling me closer.
"Tell daughter Zion, 'Look! Your Savior comes, ready to do what He said He'd do, prepared to complete what He promised.' Zion will be called new names: Holy people, God-redeemed, SOUGHT OUT, City- NOT FORSAKEN." Isaiah 62:11-12
We can run. We can hide. We can step back. But with every step we take, God's sweetness is there to draw us near. I may not have all my strength, but He doesn't require that. All I need to do is lay in His arms and be comforted.